While jogging the other morning, in some places I could see the stars, clouds, and moon, while in other places trees obstructed my view. In those places, I couldn’t see the beauty of creation in the sky, God’s glory. I later realized that this could be a metaphor for what happens sometimes in marriage. Our view can be obstructed, and we can’t see the beauty of our marriage. (Click on the title to read more.)
What is (or could be) obstructing your view of your marriage?
Our view can be obstructed by a number of things. Negative thoughts interfere with us seeing the good in our spouse and our marriage. Busyness can keep us from paying enough attention to our spouse, resulting in feeling disconnected, obstructing our view. Other people’s opinions of our spouse or marriage can cloud our view of them. Unspoken or unmet expectations of our spouse can lead to conflict in marriage, keeping us from seeing a way to a healthy marriage.
While trees that obstructed my view when jogging can’t be removed, you have the ability to remove the things getting in the way of viewing (and experiencing) your marriage as good. Catch and reject your negative thoughts, and look for the good. Adjust your priorities to make time for your marriage. Value your spouse’s opinion above that of other people, and look for truth in what she is saying. Share your desires and expectations with your spouse, rather than thinking that he should just know them.
You don’t have to settle for a marriage that is less than what you’d like, but it takes work and consistency over time to remove the obstructions to get to a better place.